This is a simple plan designed to be used alongside a child once we’ve got a good understanding about what need is being met by their behaviour; check out these resources to help you get to this point.
Having achievable goals for a child’s behaviour can be motivating for both you and your child.
Your child needs to feel supported
It’s important your child feels supported but that they also understand it’s important that they try, with support, to reduce the frequency of the distressing behaviour.
It can be helpful to set small, achievable goals with the child and to celebrate each of these milestones as it’s reached.
It’s important too to reflect back periodically and to understand what is helping and what is not with regards to changing their behaviour.
Curious not furious
Continuing to take a non-judgemental, inquisitive approach with them will best enable them to become more confident in talking about their thoughts, feelings and experiences.
When things go wrong
Be flexible and understand that things won’t always go exactly as we’d hope. Instead of seeing these moments as failures, use a time of calm to revisit the five whys and reflect back on what happened. This way, the tricky moments become learning moments and can help us to make different, more supportive decisions moving forwards.
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